Altec Lansing Expressionist Plus 2.1 Speaker System

Published Aug. 15, 2010 at 5:00 a.m.

We need to start creating more intrigue in the office.

Otherwise what will television viewers of 50 years from now have to watch?

We watch Mad Men all the time in spite of all the misogyny because, well, it’s awesome. It’s got sex, drama, power struggles, flawed characters with filthy secrets, and rampant alcohol abuse. But what are OUR grandkids going to watch to completely warp their perceptions of who we were when we were young?

If they made a show in the future called Woot Men (and if anyone calls us back about our spec script, they just might), it’d be woefully underwhelming. There’s no bar in the office. No high-powered meetings with clients followed up by seducing women at power lunches...There might be a comparable amount of smoking, but with an added persistent cough that’s sort of troubling. What would characters portraying us even talk about? “Oh, I’ve got to come up with something for these Altec Lansing Expressionist Plus 2.1 Speaker Systems.” “Good luck with that, man. I’m gonna go play Beatles Rock Band in the conference room.”

No one would watch a weekly hour-long drama in which a guy hooks up two speakers and a desktop subwoofer to his computer. Even if they DO have distinct full-spectrum audio providing deep, rich sound. Maybe you could do a serial comedy and have his wacky office mate accidentally electrocute him or something and now he can hear radio stations or predict the future or something, but that’s gonna top out at two, three seasons max.

Maybe if we had a busty Woot monkey secretary in a skin-tight dress…

Authorized for SquareTrade Extended Warranty




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